Sunday, February 26, 2017

A641.7.3.RB_AppreciatingYour"RealSelf"_LouBeldotti

A641.7.3.RB

 Appreciating Your “Real Self”


            In this exercise I was asked to examine myself introspectively.  I had a really good time with this exercise.

            I have always liked myself.  If I was asked to describe myself I would say that I am outgoing, athletic, Type-A, sarcastic, funny, narcissistic, and an intelligent man.  I am an excellent cook and can play the guitar.  However, my passion is my family.  I always put them above everything including myself.  My health, occupation and education always take second place to my family.  I have a wife, three adult children and two grandchildren.  They are the center of my universe.

            So, as I looked through my photo library, most of the pictures were of food that I have cooked, my dogs and my grandchildren.  Here are some pictures.


            These are some of my favorite things.  “Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens, brown paper packages tied up with string, these are a few of my favorite things.”

            So, I completed my “lifeline” and “rhythms of my career” activities Wow!  I really have had a crazy life but a pretty steady career path.  I was born April 20, 1964 in Boston, Massachusetts.  My parents were divorced when I was six.  My mother decided to move back to her home state of West Virginia when I was eight and she swiftly remarried.  My two brothers and I split our time between WV and MA over the course of the next decade.  At one point we lived with our fraternal grandparents for two full years but for the most part, we lived with my mother in WV and spent our summers in MA. 

            My mother moved to Colorado in 1980.  My brothers went with her and our stepfather and attended school but continued to spend our summers in MA. 

            I became a young father in the fall of 1982.  My eldest son was born on October 31st.  Trying to be responsible, I joined the Army and also graduated from High School in December of 1982.  Still trying to be responsible, I married the mother of my child on June 16, 1983, the day after I graduated from Army Training.  Over the course of relationship, we lived in Tacoma, WA, Germany and El Paso, TX.  We had our second son on July 21, 1985 however we divorced February 14, 1992.
 
            I remarried in 1992 and that relationship lasted until 1997.  We had no children.  I remarried in 1998.  My third wife gave me my one and only daughter who is going to be 18 in May.  I thought that this was my life partner but we divorced about a year after I retired from the Army in 2010.

            My younger brother passed away from cancer on April 14, 2001 at the age of 35.  He left behind a wife and three children.

            While in the Army, I achieved the rank of Master Sergeant (E-8), graduated Magna Cum Laude with a BSBA and completed my MBA with a GPA 0f 3.36 right before I retired.  I fought in two wars against terrorism and traveled the globe. I had an awesome career.

            I retired from the Army on March 31, 2010 after over 27 years.  My first civilian job was as a college recruiter but resigned to take a six-figure position with a major defense contractor.  Sadly, I was laid off after seven months.  This was also the time that I met my current wife.  During this period in my life, I found my niche and became a Junior Reserve Officer Training Corps instructor.  I have been in this current occupation since August of 2011. 

            My wife and I moved to Florida (her home state) in July of 2015.  In November of 2015, I decided to build on my education by attending ERAU to acquire an MS in leadership.  I am currently still a student and have three classes until I graduate.  It has been a mostly gratifying experience with only few exceptions.

            So, my lifeline currently ends now.  My future is still an open book.  I plan on retiring from teaching in 2022.  What I would really like to do, however, is to open my own restaurant.  I would actually leave my current occupation to achieve this goal/vision.  Let’s see how that pans out.  Stay tuned.

            In my life and work transitions, the biggest transitions have been in my personal life.  As described above, I have been married four times.  I’m not going for a record and feel that I have finally I found my forever life partner.  With regards to work, other than being laid off from what I thought was my dream job, I have had very few transitions.  I spent 27 years in the Army, a little over a year in the public/private sector and six years as a school teacher.

            Socially, I am a “social butterfly”.  I am usually the unintentional life of the party.  I have never met a stranger and have never been shy.  I will talk to anyone in public, or in private.  I also have no filter.  I say what is on my mind.  I point out everything but always do it with humor.  It actually has never affected me in my professional or personal life.  I feel that this is a gift. 

            My social web is gigantic.  My true friends were established over the course of my almost three decade career in the Army.  I really have no idea of how many people are in my circle but I have 712 friends on Facebook, 558 followers on Instagram and 109 followers on Twitter.  I currently work with 166 teachers.  I have hundreds of surviving family members.  I am in contact with the majority of these people.  The majority of these people share the same opinions and morals as I but there are a few that disagree with my views.  However, at the end of the day, we never part at odds.

            So, let’s drill a little deeper into Lou.  I am one of the most empathetic people my wife has ever met.  At least she says so.  There has been several occasions where my wife and I have been sitting on the couch and my wife will say, “Are you crying?”  This usually happens when I am watching something that touches my heart, breaks my heart, is super happy or is super sad.  I have cried watching everything from “The Blind Side” to “Snoopy, Come Home”.  Jeez!  I am one mushy dude.  That leads me to “a letter from my heart”.  I honestly cannot think of anyone that has shaped me other than my children.  The first time I held them, smelled them, kissed them and touched them has changed everything about me.  When my eldest was born, I was born.  This first time he wrapped his little hand around one of my fingers, I was made complete.  His first word, his first step, his first tooth, his first accomplishment made me who I am.  Happily, I was able to build on this experience two more times with my children. 

            I feel that my strengths are have been described in this blog, as is how others see me. 

            I feel that this exercise has given me an opportunity to see these things in me that I do not normally identify.  It gave me the ability to really take a personal inventory of myself and if I had time, I honestly could have written pages and pages!

Reference

McKee, A., Boyatzis, R., Johnston, F. (2008). Becoming a resonant leader. Harvard Business Press: Boston, MA
             



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